Uplander is getting a new battery, sorry service technician.

"nFamousCJ - Keeper of Stringbean, Gengars and a Deezul" (nfamouscj)
07/16/2015 at 13:11 • Filed to: None

Remember this? Yeah, the battery is dunzo. I had to jump it this morning from the Stringbean and it just drains my jumper box. Once started it runs but like an idiot I killed the engine when I got to FedEx. It tried to turn over but went right to the starter taktaktaktaktak.

Tomorrow it’s going into the shop to get a new battery. So maybe I’ll tackle that hub replacement on said Stringbean in the mean time?

In the mean time I’m waiting in a parking lot to get a jump. Not going to bug a stranger since its going to take a while and the vehicle has roadside assistance.

Also side note: it really pisses me off when they want to be all buddy buddy “oh I’m sorry to hear you’re having troubles getting your vehicle started let me see what I can do to help you out to get you on your way today I can definitely help you” shut up. Please. I know it’s your job to say that but I know it’s going to take time for Jimbob to show up and you’re just wasting time with your script. “Shits broke? Battery? K. Vehicle info, driver ID and location. done. Someone’s on their way.”

I’m mildly irate / hangry and about to go crush this hibachi supreme buffet place like an angry fat kid.

45 minutes til they’re here.... Fuck.

DISCUSSION (11)

JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder! > nFamousCJ - Keeper of Stringbean, Gengars and a Deezul
07/16/2015 at 13:25

I always keep a set of cables in my trunk just to try and help someone.

Also, Chevy really wanted to piss people off with that engine bay

Mattbob > nFamousCJ - Keeper of Stringbean, Gengars and a Deezul
07/16/2015 at 13:30

What I got out of this post is that I have not visited a chinese buffet in far too long. I NEED THOSE RANGOONS!

nFamousCJ - Keeper of Stringbean, Gengars and a Deezul > Mattbob
07/16/2015 at 13:40

Don’t get me started on the rangoons!

Stapleface-Now Hyphenated! > nFamousCJ - Keeper of Stringbean, Gengars and a Deezul
07/16/2015 at 13:43

WTF kind of shit battery location is that? You should never have to undo additional shit to take out a battery, besides maybe the bracket that holds it in place.

nFamousCJ - Keeper of Stringbean, Gengars and a Deezul > Stapleface-Now Hyphenated!
07/16/2015 at 13:57

Nah, let’s remove the fuse box and support framework.

Though I can’t say mines much better: Jack up vehicle, remove driver side wheel and fender well, unstrap battery

CalzoneGolem > nFamousCJ - Keeper of Stringbean, Gengars and a Deezul
07/16/2015 at 14:00

You should drive to one of those places that offer free battery install.

nFamousCJ - Keeper of Stringbean, Gengars and a Deezul > CalzoneGolem
07/16/2015 at 14:04

I think it falls under their list of vehicle expections. But that’s a good idea, I’m going to make some calls cause firestone will bill the piss out of my poor company. Who knows how much the 10 second jump job cost.

BraappBraapp > JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder!
07/16/2015 at 14:37

I do not wish the Chevy late 90’s minivans upon anyone, same family of turd as the Uplander. Terrible pieces of shit, my parents had a 2000 Chevy Venture. Headlights were dim, headgasket leaked before even 80,000 miles and when that battery died, I did the same thing he did. Sighed and cursed the manufacturer.

CalzoneGolem > nFamousCJ - Keeper of Stringbean, Gengars and a Deezul
07/16/2015 at 14:59

I can’t remember who I had do my battery when my back was broken.

AMGtech - now with more recalls! > nFamousCJ - Keeper of Stringbean, Gengars and a Deezul
07/17/2015 at 02:31

Kinja'd!!!

Wife’s R500. Do I win?

nFamousCJ - Keeper of Stringbean, Gengars and a Deezul > AMGtech - now with more recalls!
07/17/2015 at 07:48

...wow. that sure is something